


the anatomy of a happy ending

by thesameoldstreets



Category: Original Work
Genre: M/M, Original Fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 19:43:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21021230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesameoldstreets/pseuds/thesameoldstreets
Summary: Alex doesn’t remind Nick that his dad will be in town in less than two weeks. He isn’t mentioning that his dad is coming over for dinner. And he sure as hell isn’t telling him that his dad asked if Alex’s boyfriend might be joining them.





	the anatomy of a happy ending

**Author's Note:**

> This story is set in February 2019, several months after the end of the main story.

“You’re upset.”

Alex looks up from the onion he’s cutting. “It’s just the onion.”

“No, I didn’t mean the…” Nick abandons his salad and comes over to Alex. He reaches up to wipe a stray tear off Alex’s face. It’s all the onion’s fault, honestly. Nick stands on his tiptoes and gives him a kiss. “You were cutting that onion pretty aggressively.”

“No, I wasn’t.”

“Alex.”

“Everything’s fine.”

Nick reaches down and takes the knife away from Alex. He puts it on the counter and wraps his arms around Alex. “You don’t aggressively cut onions when everything’s fine.”

“Nicky, come on, it’s nothing, I swear.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Nick squeezes his sides. “Really?”

Alex sighs. “It doesn’t matter,” he says. He gently pries Nick’s hands off of him and nudges him back to his salad. “I promise.”

“So something _is_ wrong,” Nick says and throws a bunch of grape tomatoes into the salad bowl without even looking. “Is it work? You can talk to me about your team, you know?”

“Yeah, I know,” Alex says. “It’s not about the team.”

Nick pouts a little, but he doesn’t push it and turns back to the salad bowl. Alex gets started on his pasta sauce and tries not to chop anything else aggressively, so he won’t give Nick another reason to worry.

He’s so fucking worried all the time and Alex often wishes he could just… take it all away. There’s that constant weight on his shoulders. The need to perform well for his team, wondering if he’s good enough, hiding that he comes home to Alex at night, terrified that someone could find out. It’s too much.

So Alex doesn’t remind him that his dad will be in town in less than two weeks. He isn’t mentioning that his dad is coming over for dinner. And he sure as hell isn’t telling him that his dad asked if Alex’s boyfriend might be joining them.

Alex said no, his boyfriend won’t be around.

Zach didn’t push it.

In any case, Nick doesn’t need to know about any of that, because it’ll just make him feel guilty. He obviously won’t come over for dinner.

They eat dinner on the small table Alex found at a yard sale during the summer. There’s only room for four chairs, but it’s big enough for Alex and small enough that their feet knock together under the table as they eat. It’s not often that they can spend nearly the entire day together. Alex has the day off and Nick only had practice in the morning. He came over straight after and they took Byron for a long walk in the woods. Nick took a nap afterwards and Alex dozed off with him for a little while, but he eventually got up and started to clean some things up around the house.

Nick eventually found him in the kitchen, grumbling at him because he’d left.

“Hey.” Nick nudges his foot under the table.

Alex nudges him back. “Hey.”

“Do we have dessert?”

“I have ice cream,” Alex says. “Or I could make cookies.”

“Nah, you don’t have to.”

“I like making cookies. You can help.”

They end up putting ice cream on their freshly baked cookies and they sit on the couch together and put on a movie and Nick eventually falls asleep on him. Nick is leaving tomorrow after the game and he’ll be gone for nearly a week. Alex will be gone over the weekend, too, so for once their schedules actually line up.

He knows that week is going to fly by and they’ll both be distracted, but right now Alex hates the thought of saying goodbye to him tomorrow morning. Alex absent-mindedly runs his fingers through Nick’s hair, sort of like he would with Byron if he was sitting on the couch with him. Byron is over on his pillow with his purple dragon, looking sad because there’s no room for him. It’ll be just the two of them soon enough, though.

When their movie ends, Alex switches to hockey. The Sailors just started playing and are already up 2-0, less than five minutes into the game. His dad, behind the bench, looks pleased. The Sailors score another one before Alex has decided if he wants to keep watching, the goal horn rousing Nick. He blinks at the TV.

Alex turns it off. “You wanna go upstairs?”

Nick hums and pillows his head on Alex’s chest again.

“Or not,” Alex says. He needs to take out Byron one more time before they head up to sleep, but it’s not like he’s going to shove Nick off.

“In a minute,” Nick mumbles.

“Okay.”

He eventually gets Nick up to bed and takes Byron outside. It’s late February and it’s freezing, Alex standing by door while Byron does what he needs to do between the trees, Alex shuffling his feet as he waits. He gives Byron a treat when he comes back, gives his head a pat, makes sure all the doors are locked and then goes up to snuggle into bed with Nick.

Nick is already fast asleep, curled up in the middle of the bed. Alex gets ready for bed and fits himself against Nick. Most of the time, they end up getting too hot when they fall asleep close to each other, so unless it’s a particularly cold night, they’ll end up with some space between them. Usually, Nick will end up waking him up in the morning when he snuggles back against him.

It took Alex a little while to figure it out, but Nick sets his alarm ten minutes early so he can spend some time cuddling Alex before he gets out of bed.

“Good night,” Alex mumbles.

He gets a soft hum in reply.

Nick calls him from Tampa Bay, from Raleigh, from Philadelphia, from Newark.

It must be an extra stressful week for Nick. The game in Tampa is a back-to-back with a Cardinals home game, then there’s all the traveling, one hotel room after the other, hardly any time to relax. Nick always calls him. Even if it’s just a five-minute phone call, even if one of them is basically about to fall asleep. When Alex is on the road with the team as well, it gets hard to find a time to talk, so sometimes they’ll talk while Alex is at a rest stop, standing outside the bus, the team wandering about, or he’ll already be curled up in bed, or he’ll be at another team’s rink, literally only saying hello, how are you, and goodbye.

Sometimes the boys will chirp him, which is fine. He’s only a few years older than some of these guys and he was worried that they might not respect him, but they took to him quickly. They’re a good group. Mostly. Could be much worse.

Alex has been on this team, he knows the way these guys are around each other and it seems like they mostly look out for each other. One of his guys has two moms who live close enough that they come to games every now and then and Alex thought he might have to look out for that kid in particular, but there was no need for that at all. He had teammates who were looking out for him already.

Coming back to East Harbor was strange at first. Alex spent so much time there, knows all the nooks and crannies of the rink. When he came back, it felt like he’d never even left. Sometimes he’ll bring Byron with him, often enough that they’ve made him a jersey, and sometimes, after practice, some of the guys will drop by the coaches’ office just to pet his dog. Alex is glad, because he knows how stressful it can get, working out and coming to practice and doing homework and studying for tests and making time for friends. So if you can pet a dog somewhere in between, it might help just a little.

He doesn’t take him on game days and he obviously doesn’t take him on the road, so when Alex comes home after roadies, Byron is always extra excited to see him.

Alex sits on the floor to pet him, Byron slobbering all over him and they Facetime Nick that evening and Alex feels so lucky that he ended up here, because for a long time he didn’t think he’d end up anywhere in particular.

He’s barely hung up with Nick when his phone starts ringing again.

It’s his dad.

And he still has the same response to phone calls from his dad as he used to. Ignore them. Hope it’s nothing important. But his dad is coming into town at the beginning of next week, so he’ll just keep calling. And at some point Alex won’t be able to ignore the calls anymore. The problem is mostly that they’ve gone from Zach sounding vaguely disappointed to Zach sounding vaguely smug whenever they talk about Alex’s professional life. It’s annoying.

He sighs, gives Byron a long-suffering look, because he’s the only around to share his pain, and then picks up the phone. “Hey, Dad.”

“Alex,” Zach says, clearly happy. He should be. His team is riding a six-game win streak and they’re an even stronger contender for the Cup than they were last season. “How are you?”

“Uh… fine.”

“I see your team has been doing well,” Zach says.

“And I see _your_ team has been doing well,” Alex can’t help but say.

Zach laughs. “Would you like me to send you a jersey for our game in Hartford?”

“I think I’m good,” Alex says. He’s actually going to the game, but he’ll show up in his Rivera jersey. He has to support the guy who got him the ticket. Who also happens to be his boyfriend. “Maybe I’ll wear one of your old jerseys.” He won’t, obviously, but the thought of it is hilarious.

“Oh, so you are going?”

“Yeah, Nick got me a ticket,” Alex says. He needs to move this along a little quicker. “So, what’s up, Dad?”

“Can’t I just call because I want to check on my only son and see how he’s doing?”

“You’re literally coming by in, like, a week.”

“I am, but…” Zach sighs. “I just wanted to say, because I feel like we didn’t properly talk about it when we were just sending those texts…”

_Those texts_, he says, like they’re something abominable and not an efficient form of communication that Alex can use when he doesn’t actually want to speak to anyone.

“You said that your boyfriend won’t be able to come join us for dinner, which is fine, Alex, but I don’t want you to feel like…” Zach clears his throat. “If he did find the time to join us after all, I would be… cool.”

“Dad, don’t say cool.”

“I’m just trying to say, Alex, that I don’t want you to be scared of introducing your boyfriend to me.”

“I’m not.”

He really isn’t. For him, the hard part is done. He told his dad and his dad was fine with it and it doesn’t matter who he’s dating. If it was anyone else, Alex would invite him over for dinner, even though it would be horribly awkward, but it’s Nick, and he knows that Nick doesn’t want to come. He won’t even put in him a place where he has to make that choice.

“Okay,” Zach says. “I just don’t want to get into a situation where you’re afraid that I wouldn’t approve or–”

“No, Dad, seriously,” Alex says. “He just can’t come.”

“All right, all right, I’m saying no more.”

They’re both quiet for a moment. Alex wants to go right ahead and say goodbye now, but, fuck, his dad is the head coach of an NHL team and he has a gay son and maybe Alex can do something here, maybe he can make sure that if there’s a gay guy on the Sailors’ roster, he’ll have Zach Goldman on his side.

“Dad,” Alex says.

“Yeah?”

“This isn’t just about me. This is also about him. It’s not always that easy, you know? Sometimes you can’t go around telling people this stuff, because you don’t know them and you don’t know if you can trust them.”

“I see,” Zach says.

“Like, you should know this. There’s guys in the league who are gay and nobody fucking knows.”

“I do know that.”

“Okay. So… yeah. Sometimes you just can’t tell people.”

“I’m sorry,” Zach says.

Alex sighs. This was not about getting an apology out of his dad, rare as they are. “So, just come over for dinner on Friday and… I don’t know, maybe you’ll meet him some other time.”

“I’d love to.”

“Okay.”

“Thank you, Alex,” Zach says. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Yeah, see you.”

When Alex hangs up the phone, he’s about ready to collapse into bed.

Nick comes back from Newark in the middle of the night.

Alex is already fast asleep in Nick’s bed and it takes him a minute or two to register that Nick is back and quietly moving around his room.

“Hey,” Alex says. He sits up and rubs his eyes.

Nick is in the bathroom, brushinghis teeth, wearing one of Alex’s East Harbor Hockey shirts. “Hey,” he says around his toothbrush.

He crawls into bed with Alex a few minutes later, kisses him gently, says, “Hi,” kisses him again and Alex pulls him close, pulls him down against him. He has to get up early tomorrow morning, but it doesn’t occur to him to tell Nick to stop. He misses Nick every time he leaves, even if it’s only for two or three days, so losing half an hour of sleep is a small price to pay.

Nick’s touches are gentle, a little reluctant, hands wandering slowly, pushing up Alex’s shirt. Alex draws in a deep breath and Nick’s hands still.

“Okay?” Nick asks.

“Yeah,” Alex replies.

Nick leans back down to kiss him, still gentle, grinding down against Alex, gasping softly when Alex touches him. He’s careful with Nick when they get off each other’s clothes, knows that he got plastered against the boards in Philly and is probably sore all over. He loves when they just lose themselves together, but this is nice, too, when it’s late and they’re both tired, so it’s slow and gentle and afterwards they collapse next to one another, catching their breath, trading a few lazy kisses before they fall asleep.

Nick has the next day off, but he gets up with Alex and has breakfast with him, Connor still asleep. Alex leaves Byron with Nick for the day and Nick sends him pictures every hour or so. He gets twelve pictures of Connor coming into the kitchen and finding out that Byron is there.

In the evening, Nick meets him at his house and he’s already cooking dinner when Alex unlocks the door, Byron circling around him, tail wagging, as Alex hangs up his coat. Nick’s making steak and veggies, abandoning them for a second to kiss Alex before he even has time to put down all his stuff.

They’re having a lazy evening at home – honestly, it’s what most of their evenings are – and they watch a movie, wrapped in a blanket, Nick’s arms tight around him. Alex’s phone, on the table, keeps chiming with new texts, but he doesn’t have the heart to shake off Nick’s arms.

“You need to check those?” Nick asks when he gets the fifth text.

“Nah, it’s probably just my dad,” Alex says.

“Your dad?”

“He’s coming over for dinner on Monday and I asked him what he wanted to eat. Guess he has a bunch of ideas.”

“He’s coming over?”

“He wants to see the house,” Alex says. “And me, I guess.”

“Oh,” Nick says.

Alex can basically hear the gears turning, so maybe he does have to tell Nick that he’s off the hook. “It’s okay, you don’t have to come. My dad asked if he was gonna meet my boyfriend and I told him that he wasn’t gonna be around, so don’t worry.”

“He wants to meet me?”

“Well, yeah, but… I figured you didn’t want to come.”

Nick is quiet.

“What? Do you wanna come?” Alex asks.

“I…” Nick sighs. “So this is what was up last week? You were upset because of your dad?”

“I wasn’t upset.”

“You were,” Nick says.

“Fuck’s sake, Nicky.”

“Oh, come on, you were mad about something, I could tell. So why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I knew you didn’t want to come for dinner and say, ‘Hey, I’m Nick Rivera, NHL superstar and also your son’s boyfriend, nice to meet you.’ So I didn’t even bother you with it.”

“Well, you should have.”

“Why?” Alex asks. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it matters.”

“_Why_?”

“Why didn’t you ask me?”

“Because I already knew your answer.”

“But you could have still told me.”

“There’s no fucking point,” Alex snaps. This is the most ridiculous conversation they’ve ever had.

Nick sits back, scoots away from him.

“What, you’re mad now?”

Nick doesn’t reply.

“Because I didn’t ask you if you wanted to come to a dinner you were gonna say no to anyway?” Alex says. “This is fucking ridiculous.” He gets up, because now Nick is giving him the silent treatment and he isn’t in the mood to sit here with Nick glaring at him the entire time.

He grabs his phone and replies to his dad who’s sent him five different versions of _I don’t really care what’s for dinner_. Alex is just gonna make something easy, because he’ll be at East Harbor all day.

While Nick sulks on the couch, Alex starts digging through the kitchen because he needs something to do and eventually starts throwing together the ingredients for a chocolate cake, because it’s what he has and he needs something to do. Once it’s in the oven, he peers out into the living room, where Nick is still on the couch, glancing over at him. When Alex catches him looking, Nick quickly turns away.

Alex rolls his eyes.

He starts cleaning up, washing bowls, wiping down the counters. That’s when Nick shuffles into the kitchen and says,“I think I’m gonna head home.”

Alex sighs. “Seriously?”

“I’m mad at you.”

“Yeah, thanks for letting me know, I hadn’t realized,” Alex grumbles.

“Goodnight, Alex,” Nick says.

“Oh, come on, don’t leave.” Alex leans back against the counter. “I’d rather have you be mad at me here.”

“You don’t even get why I’m mad.”

“No, I really don’t,” Alex says. “But maybe you can explain it to me instead of going home.”

Nick leans against the counter across from Alex. “I just think you should have asked me. Unless you don’t want me there. Which is fine. But you could have told me that, too.”

“No, of course I want you there. But you already have so much on your plate and I didn’t wanna add more to it.”

“Okay, fine, but shouldn’t I be the one who gets to make that choice?”

“I didn’t want to make you feel bad,” Alex says.

“I get that,” Nick says. “But I do feel bad.”

“I’m sorry.”

Nick nods, shuffles his feet. His eyes are on the floor and he’s quiet.

Alex hates it when Nick gets quiet, but he gets it, Nick just wanted to be asked. And Alex was so obsessed with protecting him and making sure that he wouldn’t give him another thing to worry about, that he didn’t really spare any time thinking about how Nick would feel about not even being asked at all.

“So you want me to come?” Nick asks.

“Yeah, but I don’t want you to feel like you can’t say no. Because you can.”

“Okay,” Nick says. “I wanna think about it.”

“I–” Behind Alex, the oven starts beeping. “Sorry, I gotta take that out.” He makes sure the cake is all cooked and leaves it on top of the oven to cool.

“I was wondering what you were doing,” Nick says.

“I made cake.”

Nick laughs.

“Shut up, I don’t like it when you’re mad at me.”

Nick sticks out his bottom lip and holds out his hand to Alex, who takes it and shuffles over to him to hug him close.

“Nicky,” he says and plants a kiss on Nick’s temple, “it’s honestly okay if you don’t wanna come over. There’ll be plenty of other chances of meeting my dad. He’ll survive.”

Nick gives him a squeeze, pulls him closer and closer until Alex is flush against him and Nick is pushing his face into Alex’s shirt.

“You smell like chocolate,” Nick mumbles.

“You want some cake?”

Nick takes a deep breath. “In a minute.”

Nick has a game at home, then he’s off to a road game in Boston, then he’s back again, and then they really only have a day left before the Sailors come into town. Alex knows that the Sailors are flying in overnight and then have the rest of the day off while the Cardinals are practicing as usual.

Alex hasn’t asked Nick if he’s coming, he wants him to have time to make up his mind, but he sort of needs to know soon. He needn’t have worried, because when Nick comes over on Sunday night, the first thing he says to Alex is, “I don’t think I’m gonna have dinner with you guys tomorrow. Don’t say I told you so.”

“That’s okay,” Alex says.

Nick pulls a face. “I’m sorry.”

“Nicky, I’m serious, it’s okay.”

Nick doesn’t look like he’s okay with it, but he quickly changes the topic. “Are you nervous about seeing your dad?” he asks.

Alex shrugs. It’s the first time he’s seeing him since last summer, but he’s not dreading seeing him the way he used to. “He’ll be smug about my job, but I’ll live. It feels different now… seeing him.”

“Yeah?”

“I thought he would be disappointed. Not even mad, but… Me being gay was just another thing that was…” Alex doesn’t want to say _wrong_. There’s nothing wrong with him. But there was already so much that didn’t go according to plan and it made talking to his dad almost unbearable. Because he did want his parents to be proud of him and they were reaching a point where Alex was pretty sure that he’d never do anything that his dad would approve of. Alex shakes his head. “Anyway, it’s fine, he was fine with it and… I guess I didn’t give him enough credit.”

Nick smiles. “Do you want me to come over after?”

“I’ll text you when he’s gone,” Alex says.

Nick gives him a hug. “Okay.” He keeps his arms around Alex, quiet for a moment. “I feel stupid.”

“No, hey…”

“No, I’m just… You know, in a couple of weeks my parents will be in town and you’ll probably meet them and they’ll love you. And I know that I could come meet your dad and it’d be fine, but I’m so scared of it…”

“It’s okay to be scared,” Alex says. “I mean, I’ll totally come meet your parents, but it’s not a fucking competition. I’m pretty much done being in the closet, but you’re not. We’re not the same person and your situation is completely different from mine.”

Alex isn’t really hiding that he’s gay anymore. He’s not walking around, shouting it from the rooftops either, but if anyone asked, it’s not like he’d lie. He’d keep Nick out of it, obviously, but as far as he’s concerned, people can know. It’s definitely not the same for Nick.

“I know. But still…”

Alex kisses the top of his head. This is exactly what he wanted to avoid. Another kiss, for good measure. Alex loves him so much and he never ever wants him to feel like he’s not good enough. He just doesn’t know how to tell him that.

Zach is punctual, because of course he is, wearing a sweater that Alex’s mom must have bought for him and he hands Alex a bag as soon as he walks in through the door. “It’s not a jersey, it’s from your mom.”

Alex can’t help but laugh and takes the bag from him. “Thanks. You know, for not getting me a jersey.”

Zach shakes his head, like he’s gravely disappointed that Alex doesn’t support his team, and then bends down to scratch Byron’s head. “Still a good boy, I see.”

“Always,” Alex says. “I’ve got lasagna in the oven, but it’s gonna need another ten minutes. You want a tour of the house?”

“Yes, absolutely,” Zach says, glancing into the living room. “It looks great.”

Alex takes him around the house, shows him the study, the downstairs bathroom, the living room, the kitchen and Zach insists on also peering into the pantry and out onto the terrace, covered in snow. Afterwards they head upstairs, where things are still a little more unfinished. His room is done, but the other two rooms are mostly empty. One Alex is slowly but surely turning into a guest room, the other one is full of boxes, some empty, some full.

Alex starts with that room, because it’s the least impressive.

“Any idea what you want to do with it?” Zach asks when he peers inside.

“Eh,” Alex says. It’s a good storage room and it’ll likely stay exactly that for the foreseeable future.

“I guess it was meant to be a nursery?” Zach muses.

Alex hums non-commitally.

“Not thinking of having kids at some point?” Zach looks around. “You could always adopt.”

“I know, Dad, but I don’t think it’s…” Alex shrugs. Neither of them is terribly keen on having kids, it’s not something that was ever on the table. Not that Nick could just go an adopt a kid with him even if that was what they wanted. 

Zach clears his throat. “Your partner… doesn’t want kids?”

“Dad, it’s not just him, I don’t really want kids either.”

“Hey, it’s all right,” Zach says. “I’m not here to ask for grandchildren.”

“Maybe I’ll get another dog at some point,” Alex says.

“Lovely,” Zach says. “I promise I’ll love both my granddogs equally.”

“_Dad_.”

Zach laughs and wanders off to peer into the guest room. “I love what you’re doing with the place, Alex.”

“Thanks.”

“I just wish you’d let your mom and I help you out.”

“Not again.”

“I know, I know. Your mom told me not to bring it up.”

“I wish you’d listened.”

Zach waves him off. “So, tell me about work, then. How’s it going?”

“Good.”

Zach smiles, glances into the bathroom that Alex never uses. It sort of goes with the guest room nobody ever sleeps in. He has his own ensuite bathroom with the master bedroom, which is where they’re headed last. Alex loves his bedroom. It’s cozy, all bright whites and gentle lights and soft blankets.

They circle back down to the kitchen, where Alex busies himself with the lasagna and Zach studies the photos on his fridge. It’s the ones he brought over from the other house.

“No picture of the boyfriend?” Zach asks.

“Nope,” Alex says, even though he does have a picture of him and Nick on the fridge. They just don’t look like they’re together. Just two bros hanging out together at Ashley’s wedding. He does have that one picture of them where Nick is in his lap and Alex is kissing his cheek, but it’s a polaroid that he’s hidden away upstairs, together with some of the other things that Nick has left at his house.

“Will you at least tell me about him? I’m curious.”

“What do you want to know?”

Zach shrugs. “Does he have a name?”

“He does,” Alex says.

“Does he have… a job?”

“Yeah.”

“A dog?”

“No dog.”

“How’d you meet?”

“At the rink,” Alex says. That’s probably okay to tell him. It’s not like it’ll give anything away.

Zach smiles. “And you’re happy?”

“Yeah,” Alex says, and ducks his head, because this is getting a bit embarrassing.

“Do you think he’s…”

“Please don’t ask me if he’s the guy I’m gonna marry.”

“Why not?”

“We’ve been together for, like… It’s not even been a year.”

“I knew I wanted to marry your mother about three seconds after I first talked to her,” Zach says. “It’s not a ridiculous question to ask.”

“Okay, but… this is different.”

“I understand that.”

“Like, in a perfect world? Sure, but this isn’t…” Alex shrugs and turns away. He might have just said a little too much there. He cuts each of them a piece of lasagne.

Then there’s a hand on his back. “Alex? If there’s ever anything I can do for you…”

“You don’t need to do anything for me,” Alex says. He’s perfectly fine. “But… you’re a coach. You can…”

“Yeah?”

“Go to Pride or something.”

“Okay. What else?”

“I don’t know, just… do the most you can do, I guess. Don’t let your team get away with shit.”

Zach nods. “All right.” He pats Alex’s back. “I’m proud of you, Alex.”

Alex has no idea what to say to that, because… his dad just never fucking said that. He clears his throat. “Because I didn’t burn the lasagna?”

“Yeah, that… but some other things, too.”

Alex hums. “Ready to find out if this is edible?”

“I’m sure it is,” Zach says. “Likely better than your mother’s.”

“I’m gonna tell her you said that.”

Zach only chuckles and grabs his plate, wandering away, Byron following the food.

“Okay, buddy, you’re gonna have to stay over on your pillow, come on.”

Byron goes, but halfway through dinner, he scampers to the front door. Alex thinks nothing of it, because he sometimes barks at squirrels or whatever else is out there, but then he falls silent and stays by the door, like he’s waiting for someone he knows.

Like Nick.

Alex frowns. He can’t see the front door from here, can only see Byron’s tail, wagging happily.

“Something wrong?” Zach asks.

“No… I’m just not sure what Byron’s up to.”

When the doorbell rings a moment later, Alex already knows who’s outside the door.

“Uh, I should…”

“Yeah, no worries,” Zach says.

When Alex opens the door, Nick is on his doorstep, all bundled up. Byron is trying to push past him to say hello.

“What are you doing here?”

“Can I come in?” Nick asks.

“You don’t have to.”

“I know.”

Alex steps outside with him, pulls the door shut. “You’re not just doing this because you feel guilty?”

“No, I’m doing this, because…” Nick shrugs. “I want to be here.”

“And you’re sure?”

“I actually started coming over here about half an hour ago and I drove past your house twice because I changed my mind, but I’m here now. Can I come in?”

Alex hugs him before he lets him in through the door. It’s Nick’s choice, this isn’t on Alex anymore.

He hangs up Nick’s coat and pulls him into the living room with him, where Zach is sitting behind the couch, at the table that Alex bought for ten bucks at a yard sale last summer.

Zach abandons his lasagna and gets up, smiling at them. “Nick, didn’t think I’d see you until tomorrow.”

Nick is gripping Alex’s hand so tightly that it hurts, but Alex isn’t letting go.

“Hi, Mr. Goldman. Sorry for barging in,” Nick says.

“It’s Zach. And don’t worry,” Zach says. “Alex we have enough lasagna, don’t we?”

“Yeah,” Alex says. He’s not sure if he needs to say it, actually introduce Nick as his boyfriend or if his dad is getting it. “So, Nick is… he’s my…”

“I figured,” Zach says. “Come sit down, Nick. I’d get you a plate, but I don’t know Alex’s kitchen too well.”

“I’ll get it,” Alex says. Once Nick lets go of his hand.

Zach smiles. “Don’t worry, Nick, I promised Alex that I’d be cool.”

“I will pay you to stop saying cool.”

Nick laughs. His grip loosens by a fraction.

“You want food?” Alex asks.

Nick nods, lets him go.

When Alex walks into the kitchen, he hears his dad say, “I asked Alex earlier if his partner had a name and a job and all he told me was that the mystery man had both. Glad to see that he wasn’t lying.”

“Dad.”

“What? Am I not being cool?”

“No, not even a little bit.”

“One thing, though,” Zach says when Alex returns with Nick’s lasagna. “You said you met at the rink.”

“We did,” Nick says. “It was just… a while ago.”

Zach laughs. “Glad you came, Nick.”

They talk about hockey, because of course they do. They have dessert – Alex bought a pie on the way home – and afterwards Zach gets up to leave, uncharacteristically early.

“It was nice to see the both of you,” Zach says. “Thanks for dinner, Alex. Love your place.”

Alex nods. “Hey, Dad…” He glances at Nick, who’s gone very still and very quiet. “Nobody can know about this.”

“I know,” Zach says. “I’ve kept a secret or two before, it’s nothing you two need to worry about, I promise.”

“Thank you,” Nick whispers.

Zach just looks at them for a moment, then he says, “Well, enjoy the rest of your evening, yeah?”

“I’ll walk you to the door,” Alex mutters.

“Thank you. Good night, Nick. Take it easy on us tomorrow.”

Nick smiles a little.

Alex takes his dad to the door, gets him his coat, and then follows him outside. “You have a car?”

“Oh, no, I’ll take the… Uber.”

“I could drive you, you know?” Alex says. He’s not keen on leaving Nick here to drive his dad back to Hartford, but he’d feel bad if he didn’t at least offer.

“No, no,” Zach says. “Your boyfriend’s waiting. He’s a hockey player, you probably barely see him as it is.” He smiles sheepishly. “I like him. Good goal-scorer. Real team player. Excellent on the power play.”

“Dad.”

“Do you know how many points he has on the power play?”

“I actually do.”

“Of course you do,” Zach says. “You have good taste.”

Alex sighs.

“Give your old man a hug.”

Alex does and he holds on for a moment, because his dad really was cool about meeting Nick and only a little bit embarrassing. “Don’t tell mom yet, please?”

“No?”

“I have to talk to Nick about it first.”

“Oh, of course,” Zach says. He gives Alex another hug. He doesn’t say anything this time.

Nick is in the kitchen cleaning up when Alex comes back into the house.

“You don’t have to do that,” Alex says.

“No, no, I do,” Nick says. “Like, I really needed to do _something_.”

“You okay?”

“No, not really, but that just happened and I’ll be fine. I just…” Nick shakes his head and puts the last plate in the dishwasher. “That was… He was really nice about it.”

Alex takes his hand. “Thanks for coming, Nicky.” He slowly drags his thumb across the palm of Nick’s hand. He knows Nick has more to say, is about to find the right words, so Alex waits.

Nick takes a deep breath. “Nobody knew for such a long time. And now there’s more and more people who do and it’s…” He shrugs. “I’m scared that I’ll lose control of it, you know?”

Alex chews on his bottom lip. The worst thing for him is that he can’t make this better for Nick. There’s nothing he can say or do to help him.

“But, I…” Nick tugs his fingers through his hair. “The thing is… I love you… and I want people to know that I love you and I guess the best thing I can do is tell the people I can safely tell, right?”

Alex is going to fucking cry. But he doesn’t cry. Ever So he reaches out and hugs Nick as tightly as he can until he’s blinked away all the tears. He closes his eyes and says, “I love you, too.” He’s been meaning to say that for a long time. But he doesn’t say those things. Ever. He never learned how. It’s funny how easy it seemed just now.

Nick’s breath hitches a little. He’s definitely crying, Alex can feel his shirt getting wet.

Alex holds him. He doesn’t know if he’s mad that there’s so much pressure on Nick or if he’s proud of him for being so brave. A little bit of both, maybe.

He didn’t lie when he told his dad that, in a perfect world, he’d marry Nick in a heartbeat. It’s not important to him, getting married, it’s not something he desperately wants, but he knows that it’ll always be Nick for him and that’s all that really matters.

Nick eventually tugs on his shirt. “You hid the pucks from the hatty I scored in Seattle, didn’t you?”

Alex laughs. “Yeah.”

“Good. I guess your dad might have not liked me that much if those had been on display.”

“Nah,” Alex says, thinking about what his dad said when they were outside. “I think he would have liked you even more.”

“Put them up next time, then.”

“Yeah,” Alex says. “I will.”

He’s just happy that there’ll be a next time at all.


End file.
